Posts tagged bad boss

I will try to make this story as brief as I can. It’s so ridiculous. Since November 2009, I have been going out drinking with my boss..We are both female. We have always gotten along well. I have worked for her 3-plus years. Now my boss meets this male bartender through her female bartender friend. She develops a crush on him. So pretty much, she talks about him often. Asks for advice, etc. I am often with her 2 or 3 nights a week when we go to this bar. However, I would often leave after 2 or 3 drinks so they can spend time alone. She is basically a nice woman. Good natured and educated. Anyway, this bartender is quite flirtatious at times. Now I know that’s part of the job. I myself am an on/off again bartender for the past 6 years. She takes everything he says seriously. Now I know pretty much that he is just gassing her up. But I do believe he valued her friendship and business. She begins trying to invite him back to her place. He declines the few times she asks..I give her my honest opinion (gently) but she insists on chasing this guy nearly every night. So now the month of November passes by and now it’s December. He puts his hands on me often enough. However, I do not take it too seriously because it might be part of his “bartender routine”. For the past couple of weeks in early December, she has been feeling rejected by him and also has been getting angry with him and starting arguments. Mind you, he has never made a date with her or called her or anything. She had told me he would be affectionate with her at times and I did witness that a couple of times. But I do simply think it was affection, not attraction. He was kind of leading her on a bit. But keep in mind, lots of bartenders act that way towards their regular patrons who spend money and bring customers in. So now she begins getting very angry with him and she refuses to go there for at least a week. She decides to send me in there for information. To sum it up: He gets me trashed (I know it’s very much my fault for allowing myself to get that way)and we make out in the bathroom. I didn’t remember it afterward. I must have blacked out. He told his friend a few weeks later about it. His friend told me. I didn’t remember so I thought he was lying. But when I think back to this night , a portion of it was a blank. I then tell my boss what his friend said because I really didn’t think it actually happened. The bartender tells her it did and had the owner of the bar confirm that I was in the bathroom with him for 10 minutes. I convince her that I really didn’t remember and things were ok with us. So I thought. A few weeks later in early February she starts suspecting we are having an affair behind her back. Keep in mind, she is basically a nice woman, but since November has been drinking nearly every night to sit with this bartender and keep him company. What I am trying to say, is that she has become paranoid…She tells my other coworker about her suspicions . I believe that she thought this because at the time, he was off on Saturday nights. I don’t go out on Saturdays much because I have a child. I think she thought I was with him on Saturday nights.I really wasn’t.. she fired me via text message 3 weeks ago. She wished me and this bartender good luck together. I know I am an idiot for allowing this to happen. But keep in mind I did grow to like this guy as a friend and I trusted him so it never crossed my mind he would try to get me drunk and take advantage of me. I am very hurt by this. I was her manager and I wasn’t fired for a business reason. Also, I can understand her being upset. But not to this extent. Her judgment sucks from drinking so much lately. They are not dating. They are just friends ( well actually bartender/patron mostly) and they have never even been intimate at all. Well that’s the summary of my story…I tried to be as brief as possible. i really didn’t even leave out many details at all. That’s basically it in a nutshell…

This post was submitted by Dina.